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Showing posts from May, 2008

little john ni tatizo...

A new teacher was giving an assignment to her class one day. It was a large assignment so she started writing high up on the chalkboard. Suddenly there was a giggle from one of the male students. She quickly turned and asked, "What's so funny Pat?" "Well teacher, I just saw one of your garters." "Get out of my classroom!" she yells, "I don't want to see you for three days." The teacher turns back to the chalkboard. Realizing she had forgotten to title the assignment; she reaches to the very top of the chalkboard. Suddenly there is an even louder giggle from another male student. She quickly turns and asks, "What's so funny, Billy?" "Well teacher, I just saw both of your garters." Again she yells, "Get out of my classroom!" This time the punishment is more severe, "I don't want to see you for three weeks." She says. Embarrassed, she drops the eraser when she turns around, so she bends over to...

zali kwa wachezaji wa mpira wa miguu bongo!

Natafuta wachezaji kutoka afrika hasa watanzania kuja kujaribu soka hapa. Uwezekano wa kupata timu ni mkubwa kama yeye ni mchezaji maana atajaribiwa ktk timu nyingi na za daraja tofauti. Asiwe na umri unaozidi miaka 23. Awe na uwezo wa kujigharamia Ticket Maradhi na chakula akiwa hapa yatafanywa na kampuni. Mwariko atatumiwa na kampuni wa kuja kujaribu soka hapa Kwa vile tz haiifahamiki kisoka tutahitaji wachezaji wa mwanzo wawe wanasakata kabumbu kisawasawa ili wapeperushe jina . pia unaweza tembelea ktk web yetu . www.nowakconsulting.pl Nitwangie sms +48697461457 andika jina lako na klabu unayocheza mimi nitakutwangia simu moja kwa moja. Ama nitwangie Email mkamap@yahoo.com ama uni PM ukibainisha namba yako ya simu. ustaraabu Nimatumaini yangu hatuta ABUSE mawasiiano .Na ni mategeo yangu ujumbe tutawafikishia wahusika . Otherwise ON PEACE !!!! C U then.

pinda ndani ya muhimbili

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mh. mizengo pinda (wm, aliye katikati mwenye miwani) akishuhudia upasuaji wa moyo kwa mgonjwa "live" ndani ya chumba cha upasuaji wa moyo katika hosp. ya taifa ya muhimbili. upasuaji huo ulifanywa na daktari william mahalu.

Vijimambo vya umangani

A 50-year-old Saudi woman asked for divorce after her husband lifted her face veil while she was sleeping, local press reported. For 30 years, the wife said she never showed her face to her husband in conformity with the tradition of her native village near the south western Saudi city of Khamis Mushayt. "After all these years, he tries to commit such a big mistake," the wife told Saudi newspaper Al-Riyadh, after she left the house in total disbelief. She said the husband apologized and promised never to do it again. This is not the first case of husbands who have not seen their wives' faces in decades. When asked how she could have kids without her husband ever seeing her face, she replied: "Marriage is about love, not faces" ...yaani miaka thelathini unakula penzi nyuma ya pazia? aaah, mila na desturi nyingine bana bora kuzaliwa 'mmatumbi!'- KICHWANGUMU...

hadithi hadithii...

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janet na john siku ya sherehe ya kupokea kipaimara

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janet na kaka yake john wakiwa meza kuu ndani ya ukumbi wa jeshi "navy" kigamboni baadhi ya watumishi wenzake mama janet (vale) wakipata maakuli. aliyepiga suti nyeupe hapo ni da aisha... watu walikucha kweli kweli. hapa tunamwona da hawa naye aliyepiga kivazi cha "black" na mwenzake aliyepiga "linen" makini... ni mkucho kwa saaaanaaaa! mh. diwani mama rweyemamu na mumewe... nao walipendeza kupita kiasi. (ila ka-kamera kalikotumwa kufanya kazi hii kaligoma kumwonyesha ipasavyo mh. diwani, tunaomba radhi kwa usumbufu huo) tukio: katika mlolongo mzima wa sherehe hii, janet na john waliomba kusoma risala, katika risala hizo waliwashukuru wazazi wao na kuwaomba waendelee kuwasomesha ili waje kupata maisha bora. risala ya john iliwatoa watu machozi kwa sababu asilimia kubwa pale ukumbini hawakujua kama john ni yatima. ilimlazimu mama yake mlezi (vale) kwenda kuweka msisitizo baada ya risala huku akilia, kwamba hawakuwatuma (yeye na mumewe) na wala hawakujua yal...

kipaimara cha janet na john katika picha

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mh. diwani wa maeneo ya kigamboni mama lilian rweyemamu na mumewe nao walikuwepooo! wototo wakiselebuka kusheherekea kipaimara cha janet na john ukumbini. mkuu wa kambi brig gen s. s. omar (aliyekaa kati) na mkewe (kushoto) pamoja na col. (rtd) kisebengo nao pia walikuwepoooo hawa ndio wazazi wazaa chema vale na mumewe joseph siku hiyo ya sherehe ya watoto wao

daddy!!!!!!!!!! madogo nao...

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wadau, hii imekaaje?

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nawakilisha...

Beauty of Mathematics !!!!!!! Absolutely amazing!

1 x 8 + 1 = 9 12 x 8 + 2 = 98 123 x 8 + 3 = 987 1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876 12345 x 8 + 5 = 98765 123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654 1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543 12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432 123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321 1 x 9 + 2 = 11 12 x 9 + 3 = 111 123 x 9 + 4 = 1111 1234 x 9 + 5 = 11111 12345 x 9 + 6 = 111111 123456 x 9 + 7 = 1111111 1234567 x 9 + 8 = 11111111 12345678 x 9 + 9 = 111111111 123456789 x 9 +10= 1111111111 9 x 9 + 7 = 88 98 x 9 + 6 = 888 987 x 9 + 5 = 8888 9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888 98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888 987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888 9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888 98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888 Brilliant, isn't it? And look at this symmetry: 1 x 1 = 1 11 x 11 = 121 111 x 111 = 12321 1111 x 1111 = 1234321 11111 x 11111 = 123454321 111111 x 111111 = 12345654321 1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321 11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321 111111111 x 111111111 = 12345678987654321 !!

braza tyler perry

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“Tyler Perry tried to commit suicide during his abusive childhood, after suffering at the hands of a violent father. The 38-year-old failed, and later changed his name to disassociate himself from his miserable upbringing. Perry - born Emmett Perry - says, ‘As a kid, I considered suicide and even attempted it a couple of times because I thought it would be easier to be dead. I remember when I was 17, I did something that ticked (my father) off - something minor. My father grabbed me, threw me to the floor and stomped me. There were times when I felt I wasn’t going to make it. It was nothing but the grace of God that helped me make it through. It was more frustration than anything - not wanting to be in that situation anymore.’” We got to give it up to Tyler - he’s truly an inspirational brother. kwa kweli braza ni mfano wa kuigwa, kwa wasiomjua. ni muigizaji mzuri sana wa sinema, hivi karibuni ametoa sinema moja na janet jackson inaitwa "why did i get married" nashauri wa...

Nebraska boy (genius), 11, wins National Geographic Bee

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By STEPHEN MANNING, Associated Press Writer Wed May 21, 4:47 PM ET WASHINGTON - Quick: Cochabamba is the third-largest conurbation in what country? Your answer might be, "Huh?" But 11-year-old Akshay Rajagopal answered "Bolivia" to clinch the 20th annual National Geographic Bee on Wednesday. A conurbation is a large, densely populated urban area — and Cochabamba is the third-largest one in the South American country. Akshay's correct answer capped a two-day event in which he got every question right. A sixth-grader at Lux Middle School in Lincoln, Neb., he won a $25,000 scholarship. Along the way, Akshay answered questions that included the westernmost Asian national capital (Ankara in Turkey), the country where Makossa is a popular type of music (Cameroon), and the location of Tillya Tepe (it's in Afghanistan). "Some of them were hard but others were OK," Akshay said as he held an oversized check. "I think I was just lucky." As he blitze...

besdei ya bwigane mwasabwite

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leo ni siku ya kuzaliwa kwa mrembo wetu mwingine... kama ilivyo ada, huwa hatuna "ntima nyongo" tunamrusha hewani. ni dada bwigane mwasabwite. HEPII BESDEI BWIGANE. Mungu baba mwenyezi akujalie maisha marefu, mazuri na yenye afya njema. ufanikiwe na ndoto zako zitimie... upate watoto wa kutosha kuanzisha timu ya mpira wa miguu na netiboli. wanaokutakia heri ni bw. na bibi g. mwasabwite, kaka obby m, dada sara seme, jakline fairom, wafanyakazi wenzako akina john cosmas, stephen mfikwa, chiku haidari, flora kijole, mimi na wengineo wote. siku njema.

Siku ya kuzaliwa kwa bwigane mwasabwite

leo ni siku ya kuzaliwa kwa mrembo wetu mwingine... kama ilivyo ada, huwa hatuna "ntima nyongo" tunamrusha hewani. ni

mazishi ya gavana wa zamani, nd. balali

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Kenneth Brumley wa texas "marekani"

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akiwa kitandani hospitalini, hapo ni daktari akijitahidi kuandaa ripoti ya maandalizi ya utabibu akiwa na ma-binti zake, enzi za uzima na ufiti wake... jamaa wa zimamoto ndo walipewa kibarua cha kumtoa ndani ya chumba chake ili apelekwe hospitali stori yenyewe... AT a massive 73-stone, Kenneth Brumley must lose weight, or die. His daily intake of 30,000 calories is the same as a regular-sized man eats in two weeks. For four years he’s been confined to a bed which buckled under his weight and powerless to move his gigantic legs. Only deliveries of fast food from his partner Serena break the monotony of the day. Because of this weakness for junk food, Kenneth is among two million Americans who are over 40-stone, and classed as super morbidly obese. Kenneth, 40, from Texas , says: “I got into this shape over the last seven years. “They’ve been the worst of my life. Before ... Kenneth was healthy “It is like I’m a prisoner to myself. ...

whitney huston

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ni kama anasema "ahksante... bai bai shida, madawa, na ulevi wote!" Mungu amsaidie...

One Stop Border Post Seminar in Nairobi

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semina hiyo iliongelea mustakabali mzima wa namna ya kuboresha utendaji kazi na ukusanyaji wa ushuru wa forodha kwenye mipaka wa nchi za africa mashariki. semina hii ilifanyikia nairobi nchini kenya na kuthaminiwa na JICA pamoja na KRA. pichani watatu kutoka kulia waliokaa ni kamishna mkuu wa mamlaka ya mapato tanzania nd. harry kitillya, wa kwanza kushoto kabisa waliokaa ni kamishna wa ushuru wa forodha nd. george lauwo, aliyekaa katikati ni mgeni rasmi aliyefungua semina hiyo, naibu waziri wa fedha wa kenya mh. odinga. wapili na watatu kushoto waliokaa ni makamishna wa ushuru wa forodha wa uganda na kenya.

kwa wale wanaotaka ku-update mashine zao!

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Nawakilisha....

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kwa wale wanaotuma barua pepe zinazosema upeleke nakala kazaa au kadhaa au kathaa kwa watu kazaa na usubiri maajabu! basi mdau wetu hapo bado anasubiri maajabu yatokee! tusidanganyane jamani... NOMA!

Butter is better than Margarine!!!

Margarine was originally manufactured to fatten turkeys. When it killed the turkeys, people who had put all the money into the research wanted a payback so they put their heads together to figure out what to do with this product to get their money back. It was a white substance with no food appeal so they added the yellow coloring and sold it to people to use in place of butter. How do you like it? They have come out with some clever new flavorings. DO YOU KNOW The difference between margarine and butter? Read on … the end gets very interesting! Both have the same amount of calories. Butter is slightly higher in saturated fats at 8 grams compared to 5 grams. Eating margarine can increase heart disease in women by 53% over eating the same amount of butter, according to a recent Harvard Medical Study. Eating butter increases the absorption of many other nutrients from other foods. Butter has many nutritional benefits where margarine has a few only becau...

Butter is better than Margarine!!!

Margarine was originally manufactured to fatten turkeys. When it killed the turkeys, people who had put all the money into the research wanted a payback so they put their heads together to figure out what to do with this product to get their money back. It was a white substance with no food appeal so they added the yellow coloring and sold it to people to use in place of butter. How do you like it? They have come out with some clever new flavorings. DO YOU KNOW The difference between margarine and butter? Read on … the end gets very interesting! Both have the same amount of calories. Butter is slightly higher in saturated fats at 8 grams compared to 5 grams. Eating margarine can increase heart disease in women by 53% over eating the same amount of butter, according to a recent Harvard Medical Study. Eating butter increases the absorption of many other nutrients from other foods. Butter has many nutritional benefits where margarine has a few only becau...

we mess up with God alwayz... but he still love us back!

S ix year old Brandon decided one Saturday morning to fix his parents pancakes He found a big bowl and spoon, pulled a chair to the counter, opened the cupboard and pulled out the heavy flour canister, spilling it on the floor. He scooped some of the flour into the bowl with his hands, mixed in most of a cup of milk and added some sugar, leaving a floury trail on the floor which by now had a few tracks left by his kitten. Brandon was covered with flour and getting frustrated. He wanted this to be something very good for Mom and Dad, but it was getting very bad He didn't know what to do next, whether to put it all into the oven or on the stove and he didn't know how the stove worked!. Suddenly he saw his kitten licking from the bowl of mix and reached to push her away, knocking the egg carton to the floor. Frantically he tried to clean up this monumental mess but slipped on the eggs, getting his pajamas white and sticky. And just then he saw Dad standing at the door. Big cr...

Duniani kuna mambo!!!!!!!

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It's in INDIA - Karnataka - Bangalore (AIDS Infection)

A 10 year old boy, had eaten pineapple about 15 days back, and fell sick, from the day he had eaten. Later when he had his Health check done..... doctors diagnosed that he had AIDS . His parents couldn't believe it....Then the entire family under went a checkup... none of them suffered from Aids.. So the doctors checked again with the boy if he had eaten out....The boy said 'yes'. He had pineapple that evening. Immediately a group from the hospital went to the pineapple vendor to check. They found the pineapple seller had a cut on his finger while cutting the pineapple; his blood had spread into the fruit. When they had his blood checked...the guy was suffering from AIDS...but he himself was NOT aware. Unfortunately the boy is suffering from it now. Please take care while u eat on the road side (particularly tasty vadapav & Paani Puri) and pls fwd this mail to your dear one's. PLEASE TAKE CARE

Health - Important Tips

Answer the phone by LEFT ear . Do not drink coffee TWICE a day. Do not take pills with COOL water . Do not have HUGE meals after 5pm. Reduce the amount of OILY food you consume. Drink more WATER in the morning, less at night. Keep your distance from hand phone CHARGERS . Do not use headphones/earphone for LONG period of time. Best sleeping time is from 10pm at night to 6am in the morning. Do not lie down immediately after taking medicine before sleeping. When battery is down to the LAST grid/bar, do not answer the phone as the radiation is 1000 times.