KICHWANGUMU

President Paul Kagame of Rwanda last week granted Monitor Managing Editor DANIEL KALINAKI an exclusive interview in Kigali. In the first of a two-part report, he speaks about ethnicity, the arrest of his political rival Victoire Ingabire and the fallout with his friends, including Lt. Gen. Kayumba Nyamwasa. Below is the quote from the interview... "There should be accountability at every level; it doesn’t matter whether you’re a general, a president, an ordinary citizen, an MP or a minister; there should be a sense of accountability and that’s what has killed this country before and that’s probably what kills many other countries on the continent.”

A  Missouri farmer in his pickup, drove to a neighbor's, and knocked at the door. A boy (Little Johnny), about 9, opened the door                           "Is your Dad home?"                                                                                                                    "No sir, he isn't; he went to town."                                                                                                         "Well, is your Mother here?"                                                                                                                 "No sir, she went to town with Dad."                                                                                                         "How about your brother, Howard? Is he here?"                                                                                               "No sir, He went with Mom and Dad .

wadau mnakumbuka enzi hizi? hapo umechelewa shule, umekosa namba, mwalimu wa zamu amekomaa... ikitokea bahati mwalimu wa zamu ni mshirika wako na somo lake unafumua kinoma, hapo hukai!!! kweli historia muhimu... "utajifunzaje???? "

Users can be fined if a third party takes advantage of an open connection BERLIN - Germany's top criminal court ruled Wednesday that Internet users need to secure their private wireless connections by password to prevent unauthorized people from using their Web access to illegally download data.Internet users can be fined up to euro100 ($126) if a third party takes advantage of their unprotected WLAN connection to illegally download music or other files, the Karlsruhe-based court said in its verdict. "Private users are obligated to check whether their wireless connection is adequately secured to the danger of unauthorized third parties abusing it to commit copyright violation," the court said. But the court stopped short of holding the users responsible for the illegal content the third party downloads themselves. The court also limited its decision, ruling that users could not be expected to constantly update their wireless connection's security —

Kulikua na mabosi wawili wa kampuni moja ambao walikua wanapenda sana kutoka pamoja hasa siku za mapumziko. Walikua wanawatumia madereva wao kuwapeleka kila wanapoenda.   Kama ilivo kawaida kila bosi hujuana na dereva wake au boosi kumjua vilivyo dereva wake. Siku moja, jumapili, wakiwa wametoka na kuelekea maeneo ya ufukweni walianza kuzungumza na mazungumzo yakawa hivi:   Boss 1: aisee nakuambia sijawahi ona dereva mjinga kama huyu niliyenaye!   Boss 2: aaaaah we waongea nini……….huwezi amini huyo dereva niliyenaye yaani hamnazo kabisa.   Wakaendelea kubishana kila mmoja akisema dereva wake ni mjinga zaidi ndipo ikabidi wathibitishe kwa kila mmoja kuonyesha ujinga wa dereva wake.   Boss 1 akamuita dereva wake.   Boss 1: eeeeh chukua hii elfu 20 nenda kaninunulie TV dukani!   Dereva: sawa boss, vp niilete huku au ni i peleke nyumbani?   Boss 1: ukiweza kununua ilete hapa.   Dereva akaondoka, boss 1 akasema: waona alivo mjinga yaani hata

Na Mwandishi wetu, China. Chinese tycoon Huang Guangyu has been sentenced to 14 years in prison after being found guilty of bribery, insider trading and illegal business practices. Huang, who was for a time the richest man in china, was also fined 600 million yuan ($88m), the official Xinhua news agency said. He built a billion dollar business from almost nothing, after dropping out of school nearly 30 years ago. His business grew into a chain of more than 1,300 stores across China. The Gome chain of domestic appliance shops was the second largest in the country. The BBC's Chris Hogg in Shanghai says canny investments in property helped Mr Huang build a fortune estimated to be between $2.7bn (£1.72bn) and $6.3bn at the time of his arrest . The case was the highest profile yet involving an entrepreneur in China. Accused In 2008 he topped the Hurun Report's China rich list. A few months later he was arrested. He had been accused of manipulating share trading fo

  huwa tunasikia, au wengine wameshuhudia kuona baadhi ya watabibu kutumia kiganja cha mkono (pichani juu) au unyayo wa mguu (pichani chini) na kujua mgonjwa anasumbuliwa na nini... hii ndio njia wanayotumia. ukisoma na kufuatilia kwa makini, hata wewe utaweza kutibu! hapa tunaonyeshwa namna ya kufanya "self massage" kazi kwenu wadau...

BE WARNED!!!! Using a Weak Password Avoid simple names or words you can find in a dictionary, even with numbers tacked on the end. Instead, mix upper- and lower-case letters, numbers, and symbols. A password should have at least eight characters. One good technique is to insert numbers or symbols in the middle of a word, such as this variant on the word "houses": hO27usEs! Leaving Your Full Birth Date in Your Profile It's an ideal target for identity thieves, who could use it to obtain more information about you and potentially gain access to your bank or credit card account. If you've already entered a birth date, go to your profile page and click on the Info tab, then on Edit Information. Under the Basic Information section, choose to show only the month and day or no birthday at all. Overlooking Useful Privacy Controls For almost everything in your Facebook profile, you can limit access to only your friends, friends of friends, or yourself. Restrict a

A little Johnny was waiting for his mother to come out of the grocery Store. As he waited, he was approached by a man who asked, "Son, can You tell me where the Post Office is?" The little Johnny replied, "Sure! Just go straight down this street a couple blocks and turn to your right." The man thanked the boy kindly and said, "I'm the new pastor in town. I'd like for you to come to church on Sunday. I'll show you how to get to Heaven." The little Johnny replied with a chuckle. "Awww, come on... You don't even know the way to the Post Office."

Na Bilal Mworia, DSM A man came over and offered his services as a painter to a lady who was buying petrol at a filling station . He gave her his "complimentary card". She said "No", but after some persuasion, she accepted his card out of kindness and got in her car. The man then got into a car driven by another gentleman.. As the lady left the service station, she saw the men following her out of the station at the same time. After driving a short distance, she started feeling dizzy and could not catch her breath. She tried to open the window and realized that her hand had a sweet smelling odour. This was the same hand she used to accept the card from the gentleman at the Petrol station. She then noticed the men were trailing her. Their car was immediately behind her and she knew she had to do something at that moment. She drove into the first turning on her right and it was a busy road. She began to honk her horn repeatedly, non- stop and start

sijui...

President Barack Obama and his wife Michelle approaching the podium. Kwa kweli wamependeza sana... wanapendeza!!!! utake usitake...

One day I popped in a taxi and we took off for the airport. We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches! The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy. I mean, he was really friendly. So I asked, why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!' This is when the taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck.' He explained that many people are like garbage trucks... They run around full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment !!!!!@*%*#)^ As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they'll dump it on you. Don't take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on. Don't

By our correspondent, Dar es salaam. Please read below. The message is true. I almost lost my daughter who put a piece of the leaf of this plant in her mouth and her tongue swelled to the point of suffocation. This is one plant but there are others with the same characteristics of coloring. Those are also poisonous and we should get rid of them. Please watch out for our children. As we all leave our children home in the hands of the helpers, we should give them a safe environment where they can play .   "This plant that we have in our homes and offices is extremely dangerous! This plant is common in Kenya , Rwanda , Uganda in plant nurseries, many offices and  homes. It is a deadly poison, mainly for the children. It can kill a kid in less than a minute and an adult in 15 minutes. It should be uprooted from gardens and taken out of offices. If touched, one should never touch ones eyes; it can cause partial or permanent blindness. Please alert your buddies.

GARI LA SAFARI LA UKWELI...

Friday, April 30 03:09 pm © Sky News 2010 Granny, 72, Having A Baby With Her Grandson  A grandmother has shocked her friends and family after revealing she is having a baby with her own grandson.Pearl Carter, 72, says she has never been happier after beginning an incestuous relationship with her 26-year-old grandchild Phil Bailey. The pensioner, from Indiana, US, is using her pension to pay a surrogate mother so they can have a child, reports New Zealand's New Idea magazine. She said: "I'm not interested in anyone else's opinion. I am in love with Phil and he's in love with me. "Soon I'll be holding my son or daughter in my arms and Phil will be the proud dad." Her lover is the son of Pearl's daughter Lynette Bailey - who she put up for adoption when she was 18-years-old. When his mother passed away, Phil tracked down his long lost grandmother and they quickly fell in love. Pearl told New Idea magazine: "From the firs

By The guardian reporter 3rd May 2010 Vice President Dr Ali Mohamed Shein Vice President Dr Ali Mohamed Shein is today expected to open the Dar es Salaam Metro Forum, which aims at planning improvement of the Dar es Salaam City. The meeting to be held at Karimjee Hall, will involve participants from different sectors and places. A press statement issued by the Vice President’s Office in Dar es Salaam yesterday said the participants would discuss two main topics; a proposed Dar es Salaam infrastructure development programme and the city master plan for upgrading unplanned settlements in Dar es Salaam. They will be presented by Ubungo Member of Parliament, Charles Keenja (CCM). The participants will also get opportunities to learn and get experiences from Ahmeddabad India and Foshan from China, who will explain how they have successfully managed to improve their cities. Apart from Dr Shein, other high ranking officials to attend the meeting include representative

Please be informed that Ali Hassan Mwinyi road will be closed from 7 - 9 am and from 4 - 7 pm starting Wednesday 5th May until Friday 7th May 2010. Mlimani city premises might be completely closed all of those days, plus the airport road may be closed as and when the need arises. All this because of the World Economic Forum taking place here in Dar es salaam this week. check them at http://www.weforum.org/en/events/WorldEconomicForumonAfrica2010/index.htm

kweli watu wanatoka mbali, na mafanikio hayana kiwango cha mwisho (ni wewe tuu na kuridhika kwako)...hapo ni Obama na bibi yake. "the sky is the limit!"

Unatafuta ndoa safi asilimia 100? HaipoDISMAS, LYASSA HIVI karibuni nilitembelea mikoa ya Arusha, baadaye Dodoma ambapo pamoja na mambo mengine nilikutana na baadhi ya watu na kuzungumza kuhusu mambo tofauti yakiwemo ya ndoa. Karibu watu wengi niliokutana nao walizungumzia kero katika ndoa huku baadhi yao wakiomba kujua mbinu za kuachana kutokana na kile walichosema kwamba ndoa zimekuwa ni za shida, badala ya faraja waliyoitarajia wakati wanaingia. �Kaka Lyassa, mimi ni muumini wako, nimekuwa nikisoma sana vitabu na makala ambazo umekuwa ukiandika kwenye magazeti, niliposikia unakuja, nikaona nije nikuone,� alisema mama mmoja ambaye aliomba uandikwe mkasa tu, si jina lake. �Nisaidie la kufanya ili niachane na mume wangu maana sioni faida ya kuwa naye.� Swali:Ulitarajia faida gani wakati unaingia kwenye ndoa? Jibu: Nipate mtu ambaye naweza kusaidiana naye katika maisha,sasa amekuwa ni kero, mambo mengi anajifanyia, kwa mfano sina kazi, yeye ameajiriwa na pia ana biashara, sijui