KICHWANGUMU

By Kichwangumu Reporter DSM. When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry... She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, "You are not a man!" That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her! With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore ...

Hi All Get this message around to your contacts ASAP. PLEASE BE INFORMED THAT, THERE IS A SERIOUS VIRUS WITHOUT A CURE. You should be alert during the next few days. Do not open any message with an attachment entitled 'POSTCARD FROM HALLMARK' regardless of who sent it to you. It is a virus which opens A POSTCARD IMAGE, which 'burns' the whole hard disc C of your computer. This virus will be received from someone who has your e-mail address in his/her contact list. This is the reason why you need to INFORM all your contacts. If you receive a mail called' POSTCARD,' even though sent to you by a friend, do not open it! Shut down your computer immediately. This is the worst virus announced by CNN. It has been classified by Microsoft as the most destructive virus ever. This virus was discovered recently by McAfee, and there is no repair yet for this kind of virus. This virus simply destroys the Zero Sector of the Hard Disc, where the vital inform...

hii tunaiitaje wadau... maana ile mboga saba niijuayo mimi hapa haifui dafu! si mchezo maana yake...bofya picha angalau uifaidi kwa ukubwa, kama hukujaa udenda, sijui... picha kwa hisani ya issa michuzi blogspot

Na Mwandishi wetu DSM Usiku wa kuamkia leo, maeneo ya Ilala jirani na kiwanda cha bia TBL, transfoma moja lilipuka na madhara yake ndio kama picha zinavyoonyesha! Hakuna mtu aliyejeruhiwa mpaka tunaondoka maeneo hayo. Tunafuatilia kujua madhara zaidi.

Kwa niaba ya familia ya Bw. na Bibi Kassidi wa Sinza, Dar es salaam. Tunapenda kutoa shukrani zetu za dhati kwa wote walioshirikiana nasi kipindi cha msiba wa mtoto wetu mpendwa Arthur Francis Kassidi kilichotokea tarehe 23 Julai 2009 na kuzikwa siku hiyo hiyo. Shukrani za pekee ziwaendee madaktari, wauguzi na jumuia nzima ya Agakhan Hosp alipolazwa Arthur baada ya kuzaliwa na kabla ya kifo chake. Paroko, Masista na watoa huduma wote wa Kanisa Katoliki la Mt. Immaculata Upanga kwa huduma za kiroho hasa ubatizo na mazishi. Wafanyakazi wenzake Bw. Francis Kassidi na Bibi Clara Kassidi. Ndugu, Jamaa na Marafiki wote kwa ujumla. Ni vigumu kutaja watu wote kwa majina, lakini tunaomba mpokee shukrani zetu za dhati kwa hali, mali na moyo wa imani mliouonyesha wakati wa kutufariji katika kipindi chote kigumu mpaka sasa. Tunasema Ahksateni sana. KICHWANGUMU

Kwa masikitiko makubwa, napenda kuwataarifu wadau na wanajamii wote kwa ujumla kwamba familia ya Bw. Francis na Bi. Clara Kassidi wa Sinza dar es salaam wamepoteza mtoto wao mchanga, aliyezaliwa jumamosi iliyopita (18th July 2009) na kufariki alfajiri ya kuamkia leo (23rd July 2009) kwa matatizo ya kupumua. Kutakuwa na misa ya kumwombwa marehamu leo (alhamisi 23rd July 2009) saa 8:30 mchana katika kanisa katoliki la Mt. Immaculata, Upanga. Baada ya hapo waombelezaji na wafiwa wote kwa ujumla wataelekea Kinondoni makaburini (makaburi ya ndani) kwenda kuuhifadhi mwili wa kichanga wetu. Baada ya mazishi, wale watakaopenda kwenda kuwafariji wazazi na ndugu wanakaribishwa nyumbani kwa Bw. na Bibi Kassidi, Sinza Makaburini (kwa upande wa Shekilango Rd) au Sinza Super Star (kwa upande wa Sam Nujoma Rd). Ahksanteni sana, tunaomba ushirikiano wenu. Kwa niaba ya blogu hii ya jamii, familia yangu na mimi mwenyewe nawapa pole sana wazazi na ndugu wote kwa kufikwa na msiba huu. Poleni sana, tunaami...

Bonyeza picha kupata ukubwa ili usome vizuri

A shop owner in Moshi, was tired of people breaking into his yard/shop so he came up with the idea of shaving his dog like a lion. Everyone in Moshi recognizes a lion, now he has no problem with kibosho thugs!

Na Mwandishi wetu DSM. The following is an actual question given on a University of Liverpool chemistry final exam. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues via the Internet, which is why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well. Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's law that gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following: First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state ...

Na Mwandishi wetu DSM. Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl 'Will you marry me?' The girl said, 'NO!' And the guy lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and scotch and had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted. The end

By Jovin Shumbusho DSM MWANAMKE mmoja alikwenda kwenye duka la wanyama na ndege akitaka kununua kasuku. Cha kushangaza, akakuta kuna kasuku mmoja tu, mzuri sana ila bei yake ilikuwa ya kutupa, shilingi elfu moja tu. Ikabidi aulize mbona bei ndogo sana ? Mwenye duka akamwambia kuwa kasuku huyo anauzwa kwa bei ndogo kwa sababu alikuwa anamilikiwa na changudoa na ana lugha za ajabu ajabu sana . Kwa kuwa alivutiwa na kasuku huyo, ikabidi amnunue hivyo hivyo na kurudi naye nyumbani kwake ambako alimuweka sebuleni. Alipomuweka tu, kasuku akasema, “Nyumba mpya, mwanamke mpya” Nusu saa baadaye binti wa yule mwanamke akarejea toka shule, kasuku akasema, “Nyumba mpya, mmiliki mpya na binti mpya” Jioni ilipofika baba mwenye nyumba, Mzee John akarejea toka kazini, kasuku akasema; “He! John, unafika mpaka huku!”

At 12hr 34 minutes and 56 seconds on the 7th of August this year (2009), the time and date will be 12:34:56 07/08/09 in numeric form it is 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 This will never happen in your life again??!!!! WHAT NEXT?!?!?!?!!?

By Jovin Shumbusho DSM. One Friday morning, John woke up hurriedly and prepared for work. He worked in a busy institution and was expected early at work. His wife worked a distance from where her husband’s office was. As a result of doing things in a hurry, John unknowingly, carried his wife's mobile phone leaving behind his own. After he had gone, his wife Jane noticed the mix-up but it was too late for her to do anything about it. She thought for a while and decided to carry her husband's phone in case he came back for it. On arriving at his place of work John noticed that he had confused his wife's phone for his but decided not to go back for it. He sighed deeply because he knew his wife could access romantic messages sent by his many mistresses. His wife too was disgusted because she had several toy boys. Drama began to unfold when John received an SMS intended for his wife sent by somebody saved as ‘Peter-Taxi’, which read, "Hi sweetie, ope yo monin’ is...

By Moses Msuya DSM Man hated his wife's cat and he decided to get rid of it. He drove, 20 blocks away from home and dropped the cat there. The cat was already walking up the driveway when he approached his home. The next day, he decided to drop the cat 40 blocks away but the same thing happened. He kept increasing the number of blocks but the cat kept coming home before him. At last he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, past the bridge, then right again and another right and so on until he reached what he thought was a perfect spot and dropped the cat there. An hour later... The man calls his wife at home and asked her... "Joan...! is the cat there!?" Wife: "Yes, why do you ask!?" answered the wife. Frustrated the man said, "Put that damn cat on the phone, I am lost and I need directions to reach home!!! Moral of the story: "How much ever we dislike somebody, someday we will need their assistance. So never worry how many people d...

By Moses Msuya DSM A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye....It reads: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 10 MILES He thinks this is a figment of his imagination and drives on without second thought.... Soon he sees another sign which reads: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 5 MILES Suddenly he begins to realize that these signs are for real and drives past a third sign saying: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION NEXT RIGHT His curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive. On the far side of the parking lot is a stone building with a small sign next to the door reading: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS He climbs the steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a nun in a long black habit who asks, "What may we do for you my son?" He answers, "I saw your signs along the highway and was interested in possibly doing business.... ." "Very well my son. Please foll...

Kids Are Quick ____________________________________ TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America MARIA: Here it is. TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ? CLASS: Maria. ____________________________________ TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables. __________________________________________ TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?' GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L' TEACHER: No, that's wrong GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it. (I Love this kid) ____________________________________________ TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? DONALD: H I J K L M N O. TEACHER: What are you talking about? DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.. __________________________________ TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago. WINNIE: Me! __________________________________________ TEACHER: Glen, why do ...

Investments by Gulf Arab countries have been praised by the US treasury secretary as moves that would drive the global economy back to growth. Speaking in the Saudi port city of Jeddah on Tuesday, Timothy Geithner invited greater Arab investment in the US economy, saying that previous blocks to such investment were now no longer an issue. US security concerns prompted a backlash three years ago against a potential investment by Dubai Ports World into US ports. Geithner said that since then the US government "has put into place a series of reforms designed to safeguard national security, while providing more clarity, predictability and transparency to investors". Kwa habari zaidi BOFYA HAPA...

The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing 1,000,000 Tanzanian Shilling (TAS) bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the money. Many people had tried over time (weight lifters, longshoremen, etc.) but nobody could do it. One day a scrawny little man came in, wearing thick glasses and a polyester suit, and said in a tiny, squeaky voice, "I'd like to try the bet." After the laughter had died down, the bartender said OK, grabbed a lemon, and squeezed away. He then handed the wrinkled remains of the rind to the little man. But the crowd's laughter turned to total silence as the man clenched his fist around the lemon and six drops fell into the glass. As the crowd cheered, the bartender paid the 1,000,000/= TAS, and asked the little man, "what do you do for a living? Are you a ...

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I liked the old paths, when Moms were at home. Dads were at work. Brothers went into the army. And sisters got married BEFORE having children! Crime did not pay; Hard work did; And people knew the difference. Moms could cook; Dads would work; Children would behave. Husbands were loving; Wives were supportive; And children were polite. Women wore the jewelry; And Men wore the pants. Women looked like ladies; Men looked like gentlemen; And children looked decent. People loved the truth, And hated a lie; They came to church to get IN, Not to get OUT! Hymns sounded Godly; Sermons sounded helpful; Rejoicing sounded normal; And crying sounded sincere. Cursing was wicked; Drugs were for illness; And divorce was unthinkable. The flag was honored; Tanganyika was beautiful; And God was welcome! We read the Bible in public; Prayed in school; And preached from house to house To be called a Tanganyikan was worth dying for; To be called a Christian was w...

A serious Drinking Problem... and on Friday!

1. Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls. they prefer neat and presentable girls. 2. Guys hate flirts.. 3. When a guy says he doesn't understand you, it simply means you're not thinking the way he is. 4. Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about. 5. When a guy really likes you, he'll disregard all your bad characteristics. 6. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile. 7. Guys will do anything just to get the girl's attention. 8. when you touch a guy's heart, there's no turning back. 9. When a girl says "no", a guy hears it as "try again tomorrow". ... so true. 10. You have to tell a guy what you really want before he gets the message clearly. 11. Guys love their moms. 12. A guy would sacrifice his money for lunch just to get you a couple of roses. 13. A guy often thinks about the girl who likes him... But this doesn't mean that the guy likes her. 14....

Zimepokelewa taarifa kutoka kwa Mkuu wa Wilaya ya Mafia, Manzie Manguchie kuwa maiti 13 wanaodhaniwa kuwa ni wa ajali ya ndege iliyoanguka kutoka visiwa vya Comoro hivi karibuni wamepatikana katika fukwe za kisiwa cha Mafia katika mkoa wa Pwani. Sambamba na maiti hao, yamepatikana pia mabaki ya mabati yanayosadikiwa kuwa ni ya ndege. Baadhi ya mabati hayo yameandikwa “Airbus 310, 1990”. Kwa mujibu wa taarifa hizo, kati ya maiti waliopatikana katika maeneo mbalimbali ya fukwe za Mafia hadi saa 11 jana (Jumanne, Julai 7, 2009) jioni, maiti 11 wanaonekana kuwa ni Wazungu na maiti wawili ni Waafrika. Kwa kupitia Wizara ya Mambo ya Nje na Ushirikiano wa Kimataifa, Comoro na Ubalozi wa Ufaransa, wamejulishwa taarifa hizo. Wananchi wa Mafia na maeneo mengine wametakiwa kupiga ripoti haraka kwenye Ofisi za Wakuu wa Wilaya, Wakuu wa Mikoa na au Polisi, wakiona maiti au vyuma na mabati wanayoyatilia mashaka baharini au popote pale. Ofisi ya Waziri Mkuu imeipongeza Ofisi ya Mkuu wa Wilaya ya Mafi...

By Jovin Shumbusho DSM. Once upon a time, there was a non-conforming sparrow that decided not to fly south for the winter. However, eventually the weather turned so cold that he reluctantly started to fly south. Ice began to form on his wings and he fell to the ground in a farmyard, almost frozen. A cow passed by and crapped on the little sparrow. The sparrow thought it was the end, but the cow dung actually warmed him and defrosted his wings. Warm and happy, able to breathe again, he started to sing. The sound attracted the attention of the farm's cat. The cat cleared away the manure, found the chirping bird, and promptly ate him. End of story. There are three important lessons to take from this little story: 1. One who craps on you is not necessarily your enemy. 2. One who gets you out of the dung is not necessarily your friend. 3. And, if you're warm and happy in a pile of shit, keep your mouth shut!

By Jovin Shumbusho DSM. An old pastor lay dying. He sent a message for a TRA agent and his lawyer to come to the hospital. When they arrived, they were ushered up to his room. As they entered the room, the pastor held out his hands and motioned for them to sit on each side of the bed. The pastor grasped their hands, sighed contentedly, smiled, and stared at the ceiling. For a time, no one said anything. Both the TRA agent and lawyer were touched and flattered that the old man would ask them to be with him during his final moments. They were also puzzled because the pastor had never given any indication that he particularly liked either one of them. Finally, the Lawyer asked, "Pastor, why did you ask the two of us to come here?" The old pastor mustered all his strength, and then said weakly, "Jesus died between two thieves, and that's how I want to go".

Source: nifahamishe.com Mtoto aliyenusurika kimiujiza kwenye ajali ya ndege ya Yemen Airways iliyodondoka kwenye bahari ya Hindi karibu na visiwa vya Komoro na kuua watu 152 ameelezea jinsi alivyonusurika kimiujiza kwenye ajali hiyo. Bahia Bakari mwenye umri wa miaka 14 ndiye abiria pekee aliyenusurika kwenye ajali ya ndege ya Yemenia, Airbus A310 iliyotokea alfajiri ya jumanne wiki hii. Bahia aling'ang'ania mabaki ya ndege na kuelea juu yake kwa masaa 12 katika hali ya hewa mbaya na bahari ambayo imejaa papa wengi kabla ya waokoaji kufika na kumuopoa. Mtoto huyo ambaye hali yake inaendelea vizuri baada ya kupewa matibabu nchini Komoro amerudi kwao Ufaransa kuungana na baba yake. Kassim Bakari, baba wa msichana huyo, akiongea na vyombo vya habari vya Ufaransa alisema kuwa nilipoongea naye kwa simu aliniambia "Tuliona ndege ikiangukia kwenye maji, nilijikuta kwenye maji, niliwasikia watu wakiongea lakini sikuweza kumuona hata mtu mmoja. Nilikuwa kwenye kiza sikuona chochote...

Urafiki wa kweli kati ya wanaume na marafiki zao na urafiki wa mashaka kati ya wanawake na mashosti zao kama ulivyoonyeshwa na matukio mawili hapo chini. Karibu na ufuatilie... Women: A woman didn't come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it. Friendship among Men: A man didn't come home one night. The next morning he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The woman called her husband's 10 best friends.Eight confirmed that he had slept over, and two said he was stillthere Je kirefu cha mji wa MOSHI mnakijua; kama hamkijui ni hiki hapa: M - Mungu O - Onyesha S - Sasa H - Hela I - Ilipo Wachaga na wakazi wote wa MOSHI, Oyee eeeee!!!!!!

It's not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be: 1. a friend 2. a companion 3. a lover 4. a brother 5.. a father 6. a master 7. a chef 8. an electrician 9. a carpenter 10. a plumber 11. a mechanic 12. a decorator 13.. a stylist 14. a sexologist 15. a gynecologist 16. a psychologist 17. a pest exterminator 18. a psychiatrist 19. a healer 20. a good listener 21. an organizer 22. a good father 23.. very clean 24. sympathetic 25. athletic 26.. warm 27. attentive 28. gallant 29. intelligent 30. funny 31. creative 32. tender 33. strong 34. understanding 35. tolerant 36. prudent 37.. ambitious 38. capable 39. courageous 40. Determined! 41. true 42. dependable 43.. passionate 44. compassionate WITHOUT FORGETTING TO: 45. give her compliments regularly 46. love shopping 47. be honest 48. be very rich 49. not stress her out 50. not look at other girls AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO: 51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself 52. give her lots of time, esp...

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